Following is the Official List for tracking the Obligatory GRAMMYS Momemts this evening. You may download it here. Please don't feel limited to this list. Report back as you see these moments develop. Report unaccounted for moments as well. If you've got something to contribute and you're not yet registered, please do so here!

Now, onto the list!

Follow up:

PRESENTATIONS/ACCEPTANCE SPEECHES

• Bleep: First artist to get BLEEPED during presentation/performance
• Curse: First artist to slip a curse word by the censors
• Dubya: Great anti-GWB tirade
• Dubya: Lame anti-GWB tirade
• Foreign-language acceptance speech
• Global Warming: Lame speech by airhead chanteuse attempting to "smart up" by referring to global warming
• Heartland Rock Presenters: John Mellencamp/John Fogarty (alternate: Bob Seger/Kid Rock) joint presentation of some "heartland rock" award
• Hollywood celebrity crossover moment (eg, Jim Carey and Jenny McCarthy presenting an award for Best Comedy Recording by a mammal
• Hook: First presenter given the hook for going on too long with acceptance speech
• Ill-informed Presenter: First presenter who clearly doesn't know all the acts up for the category (forgivable mispronunciations by illiterates don't count)
• Internet/downloading: Lame speech references to the Internet and its effect on the music industry -- extra points for tired jokes at Metallica or Al Gore's expense
• James Brown: Presenter/award winner shout-out to James Brown
• Lord: Award winner/performer thanks the Lord
• Lord, Alternate: Award winner/performer thanks a lord other than Jesus, such as Zeus or Poseidon
• Suit: Appearance by "suit" carrying briefcase from sponsoring investment firm
• Suit: Lame attempt to "fun up" the introduction of the accountants with the suitcases
• Tears: First teary-eyed acceptance speech
• Thank you: First artist who proclaims, “I have so many people to thank!”
• Thank you: First artist who proclaims, “Oh my, I had no idea I would be called up here – I hope I can remember all those I’d like to thank!”
• Trip: First person to trip getting up on stage
• War: Performer who offers the most awkward and inelegant "I'm for the troops, but against the war" to court both liberals and conservatives
• Wasted: First acceptance speech by wasted artist

PERFORMANCES

• Billy Joel: Surprise Billy Joel performance of new song
• Bowling pin alignment: Each time a Beyonce/Shakira/Jessica/J-Lo/Fergie of the night employs the bowling pin alignment dance arrangement: Big star in front, 2 dancers behind her, 3 dancers behind them forming a triangle of dancers all doing the same steps
• Help: Will there be a singer who does not exhort the crowd to help them?
• Holstering of prop guitar by lead singer
• James Brown: All-star tribute to James Brown (led by Red Hot Chili Peppers and Sting)
• Lip-synch malfunction
• Marching band: Inclusion thereof
• Robed choir: Artist joined, in mid-song, by a robed choir
• Slash: Lame attempt to bridge the hip-hop/classic rock divide by deploying Slash somehow
• Sting's slow-motion prance, long coat flapping as his knees kick up, during an instrumental break in "Walking on the Moon"
• Turntable: Extraneous turntablist/scratcher

LOOK

• Hotter than Expected: First performer you now realize is hotter than you’d initially thought they were
• Lionel Ritchie's too-close-cropped beard
• New Look debut (eg, new hairdo, new facial hair, new boobs)
• Not as Hot: First performer you now realize was probably never as hot as you thought they were
• Over/Under on Stewart Copeland’s drums: 11
• Rock Hat: Drinking game suggestion: one shot/bong hit for each lame Rock Hat clearly deployed to cover up baldness
• Wardrobe malfunction

SPECIAL EDITION: SEGER TREASURE HUNT

• 2 points: Spot somebody who covered a Seger number
• 3 points: Spot somebody who collaborated with the Seeg
• 5 points: Spot anybody who played with/produced Seger
• 10 points and automatic victory to the first Townsman/Townswoman to report an Actual Seger Spotting