Didn't the David Naughton hit single and accompanying TV show "Makin' It" fall in between the Dr Pepper ad and American Werewolf? Early meta proto-Hannah Montana failure!

There was a Dr Pepper ad with Ron Guidry in it too, wasn't there?

That jingle is groovy. Sliding bass chords, even! They don't make 'em like that anymore!

I get the biggest kick out of that "Teach the World to Sing" vuh-deo, Mod. From the Germans all ger-klapping met der unison on zer von und zer sree, to -- my real fave moment -- the long hair dude who gets to "rock out" with a bit of desperate solo machismo once or twice, this is a real wiener. Sorry, winner.

As many of you know, I write music for commercials for a living, and I must tell you I find it *extremely* frustrating that nobody asks us to write "jingles" anymore. Instead, we're asked to create "environments," "vibes" and "grooves" on top of which all kinds of shit is shouted about at you, the goggle-eyed teevee watcher. In addition to finding this artistically frustrating (oh, for a chance to write the 21st century's Oscar Meyer Wiener jingle!), I really think it's short-sighted of the advertising community. Okay, so the age of the 30-second mini-pop song jingle is gone -- nobody has the attention span for that anymore. But surely folks can see the value in a pop mnemonic that helps people actually remember the name of your product! The closest to this kind of thing I can remember hearing recently was the Mazda "zoom-zoom" tune, and they couldn't even be bothered to write something with the word "Mazda" in it! To this I say: ?!

Anyhow, that's my rant and I'm sticking by it. Please note that none of it is meant to cast aspersions on the character or taste of one of our finest patrons, who hangs around here on occasion and sees fit to finance my company's fortunes with wonderful regularity and considerable generosity. To this eminence grise, this gentleman, this modern-day Doge of Venice, I say: thank you, kind sir -- I respectfully doff my virtual tri-cornered hat *and* powdered wig in your general direction!

As far as the Battle Royale is concerned, I feel certain that *any* of Manilow's mini-jingles could have been blown up into pop song size and wiped the floor with Dr. Pepper. For the record, I'll pick one you didn't mention: "Nationwide is on your siiiide..."

HVB

I'm think Randy Newman wrote the I'm a Pepper jingle, but yes google is keeping quiet about it.

Speaking of brief pop mnemonics -- N-E-S-T-L-E-S ... Nestle's makes the very best ... Chocolate! With the help of that jingle they overcame the weird spelling/pronunciation problem of their brand name and went on to become one of the world's megacorps.

I'm think Randy Newman wrote the I'm a Pepper jingle, but yes google is keeping quiet about it.

Randy... and our friend mentioned a few months back who wrote "Dazed and Confused"...at least Wikipedia claims Jake Holmes co-wrote it...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jake_Holmes

I love jingles!

I'm a fan of the "epic jingle": they're more than just one line...they're almost a whole song ("teach the world to sing" being a great example), but somehow, they don't make their commercials longer.

My fave epic jingle might be Maureen McGovern's Burger King song: "that's....whyyyyy.....Uhhhhh....MERica loves burgers....and we're america's burger king...."!

She also sang a Philadelphia National Bank commercial that some of the locals on the blog may remember.

These could've been hits for the "Anne Murray Market" of valium dazed housewives of the late 70s, as long as they didn't listen to the words too closely.

Do you remember the Nestle hundred thousand dollar bar commercial? "Caramel...(ahhhh)...chewy chewy Caramel...(ahhhh)....extra richened Car-A-Mel....".

there was a really hot girl pulling the candy bar away from her face as the caramel stretched. pretty awesome.

THAT could've been a hit along the lines of "Sugar Sugar", or Yummy Yummy Yummy.

OH...I almost forgot:

there IS a jingle that was later made into a hit:

The Carpenters "We've Only Just Begun" was a commercial for Kodak before being expanded into a full song.

and guys...you gotta check this out whether your a phillly person or not: it's the Stylistics doing a local news jingle.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=H9Yeu8hA27A

enjoy!!! seriously! check it OUT!

Saturn, I totally expected to hear the "Move Closer To Your World" jingle. Little did I know that other news channels had their own songs. They need to bring that kind of stuff back.

I quite dig this jingle for Utica Club Beer (they now brew Saranac).
http://www.ubu.com/outsiders/365/2003/023.shtml

That Stylistics Channel Ten News promo is some commercialization I can get behind. I love the way Russell Thompkins sings "Deborah Knapp!" in his falsetto. They've got that electric sitar sound working as well.

Townspeople, I'm astounded at what you've done with this special April Fools edition of Rock Town Hall Sells Out. Saturnismine and Petesecrutz, these jingles are awesome. Mrclean, your Jake Holmes knowledge comes through again! Now, with mention of the "Move Closer to Your World" jingle, which Townsman who used to be in Philly's great Baby Flamehead will step forth with an .mp3 or YouTube of that awesome cover?

This Fig Newton song and dance creeps into my head all the time. We used to do the dance when it came on, and I still like Fig Newtons!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uwc1GuHgF-0

I also like the Frito Bandito, but I won't eat Frito's because they smell like dog's feet (yes, I checked).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4OB0KNnuw4

The Frito Bandito eraser was cool, but it didn't erase for shit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dEde_lgefE

There are some great old local ones, like Great Lakes Fence Co., their number is Garfield 1 - 2323. Years ago Commander Ray would sell you a Chevy at West Park Chevrolet, and I still know the address of Bass Chevrolet. Chevy must have been big here. Those jingles worked. I remember them like yesterday and I'll remember them forever, I'm sure.

Ooey gooey rich and chewey inside...

Pete, your Utica jingle reminds me:

who can forget "potato chip" by the shadows of knight?

or "Juicy Fruit" and "coca-cola" by the Original Sins?

then there's this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRKLfuxI1r0

Let's not forget this one for the Pontiac Judge GTO with Paul Revere & The Raiders.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=_Vrc2b5qtLk

I am surprised that nobody mentioned this one from The Rolling Stones.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=nZBmhEMFdl0

TOTALLY forgot about this one -- hand over the belt!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yDZK6H3d5bk&feature=related

Good call on Honeycomb, I was thinking of that one, too.

Apples In Stereo could cover “Move Closer To Your World” and sneak it onto one of their albums without anybody realizing it. I’m also a fan of the other intro for Channel 6, the stirring full-blast one that lets you know Jim Gardner means business. Their dual theme song attack is clearly the reason Channel 6 has been dominant here for so long. Channel 10 should have kept the Stylistics on the payroll.

But anyway, the real winner for ad jingle that could have been a hit single, giving you a full song in 30 seconds, complete with instrumental opening and a bridge: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qayjR8Qbyfc – Whatever it is you think you see, the ad jingle belt belongs to me.

the honeycomb theme song, nestle's crunch (submitted by yours truly), the fig newton song....all pretty standard stuff...not beltworthy.

but the tootsie roll ad...now THAT strikes a chord with me, of course.

very hallucinatory.

i still think, however, that "potato chip" is the jingle most likely to be a hit single.

Mr. Mod, thanks for the memories of the Ideal Theme Song!

Get someone like Melanie in the studio with Norman Smith producing and HAND OVER THE BELT! "VD Is for Everybody": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tK_jDA3qrUU

The Armour Hot Dogs jingle was better than the Oscar Meyer one, and where did it get them?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JV570sxvxyE&feature=related

Since Mr. Bakshi wrote a song called Martini and Rossi over 20 years ago, it was just a matter of time before this became a living for him.

Odorono by the Who should have been a hit.

There was a jingle for Weaver chicken nuggets back in the 90's, I can't find a link for it - it was so catchy, it sounded like the composer was listening to Jellyfish.

"These are words you might've heard but take our word, Weaver, that's how to eat".

Do public service annoucements count? I'm pretty sure the vocals on this are Joanna Newsom:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xayd1c0wtOE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SWane-w2Ow – You know, I think somebody did have a hit with this one. The idea of tweaking songs just enough to use them in a jingle came up in a previous thread, but this Colgate ad seems awfully close to the source.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=0GyEkvqtHPs – Winner Rock by way of Big League Chew, the greatest of all tobacco gateway drugs. Candy cigarettes were for wimps.

So far, for me, the Armour Hot Dogs spot is winning. That dixieland vibe reminds me of one of my all-time fave trainwreck jingles, for a snack cracker called "Dixies." I'd describe the crackers to you, but the awful jingle does the trick. Imagine a riverboat dixie kind of band/orchestration, a guy with straw boater, arm band and general barbershop quartet Look prancing his way across the camera's eye, holding a bag of Dixies Snack Crackers, and singing (to the tune of "Dixie" -- as in "I wish I was in the land of cotton... etc."):

Therrrre's a new snack cracker that looks like a drumstick
Tastes so good, you lick your liiiiiips
Dixies, Dixies,
Drumstick
Snack crackers!

And if your thinking that Mr. riverboat man would have had to really work to stretch the word "lips" into the melody, or fit "snack crackers" where "dixie land" is supposed to go... you're right! Even as a nine year-old, I knew this was a real low point for teevee advertising. Oh, how I wish Youtube had a copy.

HVB

here's the burger king epic jingle...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJ3ugB74UNU

not that it beats "potato chip", or the tootsie roll commercial (which far outstrips the armour hot dog song in hit potential), but i just wanted to share.

The Meat Puppets were really big in Arizona, being an AZ band and all, so their local shows often devolved into parties. At one of these shows they had stopped playing and were mingling and partying for awhile and then unexpectedly went back on stage and played a soaring version of this- http://youtube.com/watch?v=qGjDjKJWwvs and blended it seamlessly (granted I was pretty high) with Led Zeppelin's Babe I'm Gonna Leave You and somehow transitioned to a crowd sing-a-long of the theme to Charles In Charge.

A few years later I saw, I think it might have been Faith No More opening for someone, do almost the same thing.

As a sidenote- At this particular show I was sitting next to a very large, tattooed, shaved head gentlemen who told me he had taken "a whole mess of acid because he was celebrating." "Celebrating what?" my then scrawny 120 lbs self said. "I just got out of prison," he said. This would be, more or less, the prison featured in Raising Arizona.

Good times.

The Colgate pump ad using "baggy trousers" by Madness, is even more obvious in its usage of Madness' image in this clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdcVRueT2cw&NR=1

...including reproducing the cover shots of "one step beyond" and "Seven".

Oh, come on. The greatest jingle of all time is easy.

"eight hundred five eight eight two three hundred, Em-PIIIIIIIRRRRRE! (bomp)"

They briefly changed this jingle slightly a few years ago, and I was exercised enough about it that I wrote a letter to the company and called their customer service number to complain about it -- they went back to the original jingle within a month!

Here's an oldie but greatie, the original Chiquita Banana song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFDOI24RRAE

I don't know what came first, the ad or this pop song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpzXSLsQw9Y

If the ad came first - and these songs seem similar enough - HAND OVER THE BELT!

That Colgate ad based on the Madness song is the weirdest entry in this Battle Royale, I'll give you that.

Sorry, I need to attempt to dethrone myself with this Juicy Fruit ad:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_a4mCRIPRY

Think of this done in the style of the Velvet Underground's Loaded and tell me if this is not THE jingle that shoulda been a hit single!

hungry hungry hippos!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=8HPI_HT6yjo&feature=related

spookiest entry: mr. Yuk:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=wLsONa3gKIQ&feature=related

charms blow pop:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=mH5yuQx1pL4&feature=related

Mod, I thought you had the belt sown up with that Juicy Fruit jingle, but... HAND IT OVER! I sincerely believe this is the all-time winner:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXgsa9j81Ng&feature=related

And anyhow, you shoulda used this Juicy Fruit spot. This woman's amazing knockers have been indelibly etched into my brain since I first beheld them in the mid-80s:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=eH7PCnCwbbA

Those are indeed what my Aunt Patsy -- who would know -- used to refer to as "ten-gallon jugs."

That Shasta one is awesome, Hrrundi. Can you get that guitar sound? I'd love to use that tone on a recording. You may HOLD THE BELT...for now!

You’re all limiting yourselves by being slaves to the pop construct. When this science dropped, it was on all the underground hip hop mix tapes of the day: http://youtube.com/watch?v=hPb155B5HQg

Hall & Oates would have charted with this one, if they would have put in a call to Frank Carvel: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gT9fsjfixqQ

At the risk of going too Philadelphia-centric, anybody who remembers the commercial for The Pizza Place has to admit that it would win this Battle Royale in a walk if it was available on the web somewhere, right?

I can't find it on YouTube but the early 80's Frank's Orange Soda ad featuring Scandal was pretty much a rip-off on "goodbye to you"

I have haunting memories of the keyboard player wearing the typical horizontal striped shirt

I would love to see stats on how many Philadelphians have searched YouTube for that classic Frank's ad. (Frank's was THE local brand of soda for Philly natives of a certain age.) I know I've looked for hours over the last couple of years and never found it. I did just find this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yhzp4wfj4M

Bubblicious
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4qRuL5CteKo

TDK
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZgZrznl-Vs

Acid is groovy!

Petesecrutz, you presently HOLD THE BELT! Congratulations on two stunning entries. I'd forgotten all about that Bubblicious commercial, and the TDK one sounded like a cross between Tina Turner's version of "Acid Queen" (from the Tommy movie) and Lene Lovich! It's your call which entry is now seen parading around the ring, taunting would-be challengers.

farts...when i was searching for jingles last night, i remember seeing the icon for that bubbilicious commercial and forgot to post it!

it's a great one!

here's a non-entry, but just wanted to share:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=n8vXzoAN2fE

You may remember Spirograph, but did you know you could have the coolest bass drum on the planet with one? I was a Spiromaniac for awhile.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbvmKzf_wr4&NR=1

Great laugh from the past, Sat.

2K, that "Spiromania" clip is hot! What do you The People think? Has 2K wrestled the belt from Petesecrutz? Do they need to go head-to-head over this? Is there another contender lurking who will blow them both out of the squared circle?

Here's one more. I hate to admit that I had this Chili's ad in my head for months. Drove my wife and kids crazy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1l87Wzselg

Andyr, what is it about the kickdrum pattern that attracts you to this ad?

I gotta figger out the hyperlink bidness. Watching petesecrutz belt worthy Bubblicious trip reminded me of something like this one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBvQ5Eb9oZ8

or something like it. Does 'word jazz' count as a jingle?

Telewacker, as I think I noted earlier, there's nothing you can figure out. The Comments field doesn't allow the posting of hyperlinks. The Back Office and I can go into your comments and hyperlink what you've provided when we get the time. I just saw your link and had the time! Thanks.