Apr 052011
 

Kramer prepares to check out Jerry's 20 records.

I was watching an early Seinfeld episode and there was a scene in his apartment in which a stack of about 20 lps were visible. I never thought of Jerry listening to music before; in fact, even after catching a glimpe of his collection I have trouble imagining what records he might have owned. Elaine displayed a knowledge of Eagles‘ hits in one episode, but did Jerry ever make a music reference? Maybe. I’m not one of those people who can remember every episode of a beloved show…

Anyhow, I was thinking: What 20 records would Jerry Seinfeld—the character—have owned?

While you’re at it, name one (1) favorite record of any of the following TV characters (you don’t have to list one for each):

  • All in the Family‘s Mike Stivic
  • Ted Danson as Sam from Cheers
  • Kate and Allie
  • Raj from What’s Happening
  • Frank Fontana of Murphy Brown
  • Roseanne
  • Weird Harold of Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids
  • Mary Richards of Mary Tyler Moore Show
  • Ted Danson as the title character in Becker

Bonus question #1: What boss tunes was Michael Knight of Knight Rider blasting when the cameras weren’t rolling?

Bonus question #2: Who had the second-coolest record collection on One Day at a Time: Ann Romano (ie, Bonnie Franklin’s Mom character), Julie Cooper (ie, older daughter Mackenzie Philips), Barbara Cooper (ie, teen dream Valerie Bertinelli), or Schneider?

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  48 Responses to “Seinfeld’s Record Collection”

  1. I sense Jerry’s music collection was your standard set of records every person I knew in college whose collection consisted of 20 or less records had who listened to classic rock radio at the time..

    All in the Family‘s Mike Stivic – David Crosby’s “If Only I Could Remember My Name”

    Ted Danson as Sam from Cheers – Steely Dan – “Pretzel Logic”

    Roseanne – Edgar Winter Group – “They Only Come Out at Night”

    Weird Harold of Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids – Funkadelic “Maggot Brain”

    Mary Richards of Mary Tyler Moore Show – Nilsson Schmilsson

    Bonus question #1: What boss tunes was Michael Knight of Knight Rider blasting when the cameras weren’t rolling?
    Space Station #5 – Montrose

    Totally unrelated, but I just thought of it, Wasn’t Sherman Hemsley of The Jeffersons a huge Gong fan? This was a failed sitcom moment, they should have had his character totally into Gong.

  2. I’ll take a stab at Jerry’s record collection. I suspect it would be pretty middle of the road with lots of greatest hits collections. He’d probably have a couple jazz records and a couple old records that he never listens to anymore. Probably not much new stuff.

    The Steve Miller Band – Fly Like An Eagle
    Dire Straits – Brothers In Arms
    Steely Dan – Gold
    Neil Diamond’s 12 Greatest Hits
    James Taylor’s Greatest Hits
    Billy Joel – Glass Houses
    Abba – Gold: Greatest Hits
    Michael Jackson – Thriller
    Fleetwood Mac – Rumors
    UB40 – Labour of Love
    The Saturday Night Fever Soundtrack
    Carole King – Tapestry
    The Eagles Greatest Hits
    Elton John’s Greatest Hits
    Bob Marley – Legend
    Pink Floyd – Dark Side Of The Moon
    Miles Davis – Kind of Blue
    Dave Brubeck – Time Out
    Queen’s Greatest Hits
    Police – Synchronicity

  3. Jerry obviously got his collection from Columbia House. He chose the 20 most popular records at the time, paid his penny, and terminated his contract. Even though Jerry has plenty of money, he is still Jewish.

  4. Glass Houses, for sure!

  5. Seinfeld – A bunch of Greatest Hits collections by James Taylor, Billy Joel, Eagles etc

    Bonus Answer to a question never asked: I suspect Neuman is a huge prog rocker

    Super Deluxe Bonus Answer to a question never asked: I think I would like Kramer’s taste in music the best. He was always into some sort of weird Bossa Nova type music which would be much more interesting than listening to Springsteen hits with George.

    All in the Family‘s Mike Stivic – Eve of Destruction or “Come on people now, smile on your brother…”

    Ted Danson as Sam from Cheers – Centerfield by John Fogerty (I think Sam was just that obvious).

    Kate and Allie I never watched it.

    Raj from What’s Happening I never watched it.

    Frank Fontana of Murphy Brown – Cat Stevens Tea for the Tillerman

    Roseanne – Someone from the Class of ’89. Maybe Garth Brooks or Shania Twain

    Weird Harold – TSOP

    Mary Richards of Mary Tyler Moore Show Carol King Tapestries

    Ted Danson as the title character in Becker I never watched it.

    Bonus question #1: Knight Rider I never watched it but I’ll guess something bombastic and pop like the Final Countdown

    Bonus question #2: Julie Cooper – As the rebellious older daughter from the mid-70’s. the worst thing likely to be in her album collection was the Runaways.

  6. George Jefferson was also a fan of Amon Duul II.

  7. cherguevara

    I think Hank Fan has it right. I was thinking the collection would probably contain a few comedy albums too, such as:

    Steve Martin – Let’s Get Small
    Bill Cosby – Why is there air?
    Allan Sherman – My Son the (Nut, Comedian, etc pick one).
    Tom Lehrer – That Was The Year That Was
    Robert Klein – Child of the 50’s

  8. Good call on Neuman. He’s even got all the Triumverat albums.

  9. Man, I think Hank Fan nailed it! I would take out the jazz albums but other than that, you got it.

  10. misterioso

    Isn’t there another episode where Kramer tries to make money selling old records in the Village, and Jerry lets him take his lps but the guy in the store basically laughs at them because they are by Sergio Mendes and Jerry Vale and so on? I always thought was weird, since even though I wouldn’t expect Jerry to have good taste in music, I wouldn’t expect his records to be quite so…campy?

  11. shawnkilroy

    Eagles-Greatest Hits
    Bee Gees/Various-Saturday Night Fever Soundtrack
    Carol King-Tapestry
    James Taylor-One Man Dog
    The Beatles-Hey Jude
    Carley Simon-Playing Possum
    Barbra Streisand-Guilty
    Barbra Streisand-Streisand Superman
    Supertramp-Breakfast In America
    Original Broadway Cast-Fiddler On The Roof
    Connie Francis-Sings Jewish Favorites
    Michael Jackson-Off The Wall
    Michael Jackson-Thriller
    Lou Rawls-All Things In Time
    Frank Sinatra-Strangers In The Night
    Henney Youngman-Take My Album Please
    Lenny Bruce-Carnegie Hall
    Richard Pryor-Bicentennial Nigger
    Woody Allen-Stand Up Comic
    Steve Martin-Let’s Get Small

  12. Really, or are you making this up? The episode sounds plausible!

  13. Carly Simon’s Playing Possum – definitely!

  14. I don’t think those were Jerry’s albums. They belonged to some old man Kramer had access to (he also ends up sleeping with the old guy’s nurse), through some other character, and the old man flips out & wants to have him arrested for stealing his albums….at least, that’s how I remember it.

  15. I think he’d have some old Bob & Ray, Bob Newhart, Rodney Dangerfield & George Carlin in there, too.

  16. alexmagic

    I agree about TV Jerry’s (possibly Real Jerry’s) record collection consisting mostly of greatest hits and soundtrack albums, and specifically about the Columbia House thing. That was my first thought. I’d say his 20 albums in 1995 included Garth Brooks’ The Hits, Springsteen’s Greatest Hits, Hootie’s Cracked Rear View, Eagles’ Hell Freezes Over, Sheryl Crow’s Tuesday Night Music Club, Sting’s Fields of Gold, the Forrest Gump Soundtrack and the Best Of Sade.

    I do think that was one of the better detail jokes about the character, too. Obviously, you almost never see the music/movie collections that a real person has on a TV show, but I think it said a lot about the emotional void that they slowly, intentionally turned Jerry into that he only had 20 albums and maybe 10 movies – one of which is Home Alone – to his name.

    For the others:
    Mike Stivic: Meathead went through a dark emotional phase, which for him meant a prized Vanilla Fudge album. Let’s say Renaissance.

    Sam “Mayday” Malone: Given his age and my distinct memory that his favorite movie was the Magnificent Seven, I’d say his collection includes prized places for Roy Orbison’s Lonely and Blue and some kind of early ’60s Drifters collection.

    Kate and Allie: Carly Simon’s Night Secrets for Allie. For Kate, surprisingly, Gang of Four’s Entertainment!.

    Roger “Raj” Thomas: Naturally, Raj had a prized copy of the Doobies’ What Were Once Vices Are Now Habits. He also had a copy of Maggot Brain that he had to keep hidden in a Songs In The Key of Life sleeve so Dee and Mrs. Thomas wouldn’t find it.

    Frank Fontana: The James Gang, Thirds

    Roseanne: CSNY, Deja Vu

    Weird Harold: Sun Ra, Atlantis

    Mary Richards: Joni Mitchell, Ladies of the Canyon

    Becker: Steely Dan, Aja

    Michael Knight: Had KITT running a constant rotation of The Pointer Sisters’ Break Out, Donnie Iris’ King Cool and Prince’s 2nd, 3rd and 4th albums.

    Schneider: Schneider’s visible record collection was either all Sha Na Na, or all Zappa and Beefheart. But his real collection was a bunch of homemade tapes of weird moans, guttural noises, buzzing sounds and shrieks of unknown origin that police would later speculate tied in to the abnormally high turnover rate of now missing drifters and former tenants who stayed in the various buildings Schneider would super at around town, all of which were connected by a network of underground sewer tunnels.

  17. This is important work we’re doing today. Thanks. I’m sure Seinfeld fanboy sites will stumble across this thread and thank us too.

    One of the things I keep thinking about is that, beside his 6-8 comedy albums – and you have listed some keepers – I’d say most of Jerry’s albums were bought to impress girls. In other words, he’d have been all about “make-out music.” (I know this is a foreign – or should I say wasted – concept to most of us dudes found hanging in these hallowed halls.) One album I do think would have been all Jerry’s, beside the copy of Twin Sons of Different Mothers handed down from his invisible big sister, is Zappa’s Sheik Yer Booty. My apologies if I’ve misspelled the album title, but I think that would be the most rocking thing Jerry would play for his own enjoyment. I bet he’s got a Weather Report album as well, being a big fan of drummer Chad Wackerman.

    So many great suggestions, so far, for the other tv characters, but Mad props! to alexmagic for picking up on Meathead’s Vanilla Fudge album. I was thinking he’d have been into some New York heavy rock bands like them, Mountain, and even Billy Joel’s old band, Attila (?), way before he knew of and tolerated the sensitive solo Joel, if that’s what it took for Gloria to feel like making love.

  18. * All in the Family‘s Mike Stivic – MC5 – “Kick Out The
    Jams”, some Dylan, CSNY – “So Far”
    * Ted Danson as Sam from Cheers – Mainly make out
    music he thinks the chicks will dig (Barry White,
    Marvin Gaye, Teddy Pendergrass, etc.)…and maybe
    Fogerty’s “Centerfield” album as a personal fave.
    * Kate and Allie – “Tapestry”, some Gordon Lightfoot….
    * Raj from What’s Happening – “Off The Wall” & some
    Sugar Hill Records twelve inch singles
    * Frank Fontana of Murphy Brown – who?
    * Roseanne – Best of Foghat, Best of B.T.O., The Nuge’s
    “Cat Scratch Fever”.
    * Weird Harold of Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids – Muddy
    Waters – “Electric Mud”, Bootsy’s Rubber Band –
    “Ahh…The Name Is Bootsy, Baby!”
    * Mary Richards of Mary Tyler Moore Show – Nothing but
    Hawkwind and Manowar – she’s full of surprises, that one.
    * Ted Danson as the title character in Becker – none. He
    just wants some silence, dammit!

    Michael Knight seems like he’d be a fan of Don Henley’s solo career….and Philip Michael Thomas’ albums.

    2nd best? Julie.

  19. Jerry, 5 guesses would be….

    Michael McDonald
    Bruce Hornsby
    Bob Newhart
    Marvin Gaye
    Joni Mitchell

  20. shawnkilroy

    “Roger “Raj” Thomas: Naturally, Raj had a prized copy of the Doobies’ What Were Once Vices Are Now Habits. He also had a copy of Maggot Brain that he had to keep hidden in a Songs In The Key of Life sleeve so Dee and Mrs. Thomas wouldn’t find it.”

    hahahahahahaha!

  21. The jazz records were a gift he received. He’s never put them on.

  22. misterioso

    Oh, ye of little faith. In the episode in question, Kramer first gets Jerry’s lps which are dissed by the record store guy; see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7C7OpOg_zw4

    THEN Kramer goes to get the lps that the cranky old man that Jerry is supposed to be volunteering to visit is throwing away. I can’t find clips but here’s the script. http://www.seinfeldscripts.com/TheOldMan.htm

    According to wikipedia, “The record on the top of Jerry’s stack after Kramer and Newman return them to him is Journey’s Escape.” Which seems about right. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Old_Man

  23. this was an awesome post. I registered just to acknowledge it and remind everyone of the episode where Jerry’s taking homegirl out to see Paul Simon in the park. Maybe that will help set the tone for this 20something collection of records…

  24. Thanks, kevin, you just made this thread that much more awesome. How did we forget that one? Don’t be a stranger; the more the merrier and all that jazz!

  25. My faith was in your ability to bullshit me – and my ability to forget that episode. Bravo!

  26. I’m still laughing at your choices for Roseanne. Nice!

  27. Okay, but according to the script, the Sergio Mendes albums were Kramer’s. Journey kinda figures as a Jerry record.
    I think this was the clip you were looking for: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC2CM7UVzPQ
    That first clip you posted is actually an edit of the first time they go in with Kramer & Jerry’s records AND from when they go back with the old guy’s records (Jolson is mentioned).

    I gotta say, that “Saw” guy did a great Bleeker Bob impression! He was almost as dickish as the real thing! Also, I forgot it was GEORGE who ended up with the hot nurse/maid/whateverherjobwas at the end.

  28. I can’t see Jerry listening to much music either. I have commented here before that my brother owns about 40 CDs and is totally happy with that. I would imagine most people are like that. A successful performing artist (stand-up in this case) would likely be obsessed with his own craft so I’d bet that 2/3 of Jerry’s albums would be comedy classics he studies for set structure and pacing, some other town citizens have registered comedy albums as well. Folks like Woody Allen, Bob Newhart and Steve Martin would inform Jerry’s style. More confrontational acts like George Carlin and Richard Pryor probably less so but I’d bet Seinfeld has checked them out as a stretch. I figure the hipster doofus, Kramer, with all of his free time and enthusiasm for odd projects would make a pretty good Townsperson.

    Others mentioned:
    Meathead impressed Gloria with his serious, counterculture Dylan studies but he’s probably got some Don McLean “American Pie” in there as well.
    Sam Malone was easy. A no-nonsense sports and party guy from Boston would play Aerosmith’s red Greatest Hits album on repeat.
    Frank Fontana would probably be one of those guys who would go to the wall defending a band like Killing Joke or Rage Against the Machine
    Roseanne and Dan would rock out to Middle American bar band rock; bring on the CCR and Seger. It would be enough to make Darlene rebel toward Depeche Mode and Bauhaus (I’m sure Roseanne has quite a few musical references during the show)
    Mary Richards probably had the good taste to have a long-standing crush on Ray Davies.

    Two sitcom characters I loved and always thought of as big music fans were brothers Donal Louge and Kevin Corrigan from “Grounded For Life”. http://www.autumnreeser.com/images/uploads/projects/gflgroupsized8vv.jpg I bet those two were in the pits of every Black Flag, Minor Threat and Cro-Mags show that came through Long Island.

  29. tonyola

    Wow. Gong and Amon Duul. Two of my faves too. Who’da thunk it? Sherman Hemsley a hardcore prog fan!

  30. ladymisskirroyale

    Great post! You guys have this nailed so I don’t think I have anything original to add other than would Seinfeld listen to Lenny Bruce?

    But it did get me thinking to other tv characters from that impressionable age:

    Did Charlie’s Angels listen to music? What was Mork’s favorites? (Did he just listen to Robin Williams comedy routines?) Did Dick Van Patten’s kids have differing musical tastes on “Eight is Enough?” (I seem to recall Grant Goodeve having a pretty cool pad with a hi fi.) How much was music part of “Happy Days” – there was that juke box during the opening credits -what was on that? They went to dances at Arnold’s/Al’s…

  31. 2000 Man

    I don’t know all 20 Jerry would have, but I seem to remember he had a stereo with big cabinets with butt ugly blue grills, and the speakers were facing in a perpendicular fashion, and they should have been on stands. My guess is he got it for his 16th birthday, and discovered he didn’t like music after buying music to impress girls with. I’d think he had Elton John’s Tumbleweed Connection and Honky Chateau, Rod Stewart’s Every Picture Tells a Story, Cat Stevens’ Tea for the Tillerman, Carole King’s Tapestry, James Taylor’s Mud Slide Slim, The Beatles’ Abbey Road, Simon and Garfunkle’s Bridge Over Troubled Water, Gilbert O’Sullivan’s Himself and Led Zeppelin 4. Girls weren’t particularly impressed because Jerry didn’t even have the bass and treble controls figured out, and had once speaker literally facing his mattress when he was a teenager.

    For the others:

    All in the Family‘s Mike Stivic – Woodstock Soundtrack
    Ted Danson as Sam from Cheers – The finest collection of Space Age Bachelor Pad records ever assembled
    Kate and Allie – This was a show?
    Raj from What’s Happening – All the Doobie Bros for sure!
    Frank Fontana of Murphy Brown – must be Thirds because I didn’t know who he was until it was mentioned.
    Roseanne – Midwestern Muscle Music! Grand Funk, The Nooge, The Stones. All new music sucks, though. New being recorded after 1975.
    Weird Harold of Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids – Well he was weird, so Sun Ra, I guess.
    Mary Richards of Mary Tyler Moore Show – Mary just listened to the radio. Same station for her whole life, Top 40 in the 70’s and that AAA format now.
    Ted Danson as the title character in Becker – I think he’d like Coltrane and think you must be stupid if you didn’t agree how great he was.

    Bonus question #1: Dunno what Michael Knight blasted, but I know Kitt got stuck with a German True Stereo Cassette by David Hasselhoff. Poor car.

    Bonus question #2: I don’t know, who had the coolest one?

  32. misterioso

    bobbybittman, regarding your last post: How can you tell whose records Kramer brings into the shop? I don’t think we ever see Kramer with any of his own records, just the ones he got from Jerry. Of course, I can’t be sure about that…

  33. shawnkilroy

    ok, 2 things:
    I forgot Huey Lewis & The News-Sports is definitely on that shelf.
    AND
    The Richard Pryor record i mentioned above was a gift from Jerry’s neighbor, Cosmo Kramer.

  34. It’s in the script. When they get back to Jerry’s and Kramer is blaming Jerry for the paltry sum they were offered on Jerry’s embarrassing records, Jerry makes some dismissive remark, like, “Yeah, you and your Sergio Mendes…”

  35. cherguevara

    Mork would probably have had one of those little boxes of 45’s, all of which he would play at 33.

  36. y’all made my day….great stuff

    God bless the Columbia house 12 for a penny, where people who are barely music fans can have an instant collection of the blandest, most run-of-the mill corporate force-fed, lowest-common-denominator music of the moment (and a few greatest-hits comps).

    When I had my Cd store I would get people who would trade their 12 free Cds and get 6 more of the same kind of crappy CDs with their credits. One Sherryl Crow for one Best Of The Doobies. One Matchbox 20 for one Garth Brooks or Rod Stewart Ballads.

  37. misterioso

    You’re right, bobbybittman! Well done. Thanks for clarifying that. It always seemed a little weird that Jerry would have such weird records. Journey’s Escape is much more like it.

  38. trigmogigmo

    There’s got to be a Looney Tunes soundtrack album on the shelf.

  39. I love these mediocre trades!

  40. Haha yeah or a Shea Stadium organ music LP

  41. As funny answers continue to roll in, I must say that there’s been a reluctance to tackle the difficult issue of who had the second-coolest record collection on One Day at a Time. First, of course, we must determine who had the coolest collection.

    Schneider gets credit for owning a half dozen Groundhogs albums, but he also gets nearly equal points off for owning a half dozen Groundhogs albums. This leaves Julie as the clear-cut coolest record collector on the show. She doesn’t go over the top with under-the-radar purchases, but she was the first kid in her school to buy Bowie’s Pin-ups.

    Now the question is, Does Schneider and his Groundhogs/late-period Pretty Things/Uriah Heep-rich collection hold up to the mom’s Leonard Cohen/Tim Buckley/Tim Hardin albums left by an old boyfriend, which she keeps tucked away behind her soundtrack albums from A Star Is Born and The Rose?

  42. machinery

    I’m going to go in a slightly different direction on this one. It seemed that Jerry always had one girlfriend after another (and attractive ones at that.) So, given his less-than-stellar looks, I’m going to assume his collection was stocked with the typical go-to music guys put on to, ahem, set the mood, show their sensitive side, etc.

    So: Roxy’s Avalon, One of the mellow REM, Mile’s Kind of Blue, a Smiths album, Al Green, Nonesuch, etc…

  43. dbuskirk

    Surprises from Seinfeld record collection:
    Blotto – Hello My Name is Blotto, What’s Yours e.p.
    Talking Heads – More Songs About Buildings and Food
    Human Sexual Response – Figure 14
    Madness – Keep Moving
    Adam and the Ants – Kings of the Wild Frontier
    Human League – Dare
    The Joboxers – Like Gangbusters
    Pulsallama – The Devil Lives in My Husband’s Body 12″ single
    Culture Club – Colour By Numbers
    Robin Williams – Reality, What a Concept

  44. Oh man, he was totally into that Joboxers album!

  45. donnie iris…man, now there’s a lesson in false advertising. or maybe it was genius for the time, as in, “he looks like elvis costello, but sounds like def leppard.” dang, i can’t find my copy, so don’t hold me to the def leppard thing, i could just as easily be thinking of the band “F.M.”

    t.v. character most likely to have/like donnie iris: the older brother on “the wonder years.” the local radio station donated a promo to the school carnival’s white elephant sale.

  46. the thing about roseanne is that she liked all the popular stuff, had only the greatest hits, but partied at the concerts like a real fan.

  47. I’m pretty sure David Bradshaw/Grant Goodeve was a Gram Parsons fan. He was a Rolling Stones fan in High School, but then “Wild Horses” led him down a path away from pop pap and into Real People (not the show).

  48. Don’t forget the Very Special One Day At A Time where Schneider explains why he has a Chocolate Watchband album.

    Bonnie Franklin is Pavarotti all the way.

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