Flame on. Call a doctor. Speak your peace. This is the place to unload.

Maturity. That tricky process that any rock musician is faced with at some point. A band that never matures, or grows in some way, ends up the worst type of charicature, the kind that give credence to each generation of parents who complain about “that racket” their kids are listening to. See The Ramones shortly following End of the Century and Rock ‘n Roll High School as Example A. They would go on to give “youth culture” a bad name for the next 10 years.

It’s rare that your favorite band matures at a rate that fans can keep up with. Sometimes the artist actually is going through “growing pains” that rightfully leave fans scratching their heads or storming out of concerts grumbling, “I didn’t come here to see #%@@&$^$@#$ing Mariah Carey!” (grumbled by Townsman Ken at Elvis Costello’s Mighty Like a Turd Tour). Other times the artist simply grows up before their audience can figure out exactly what’s going on. Bob Dylan plugging in may be the best example of this phenomenon; I wonder if old Tom Waits fans felt this way when Swordfishtrombones came out.

What’s been your experience with favorite artists “maturing” before your eyes? Have you kept pace with them, caught up with them later, decided you simply didn’t like what they were up to, pouted and sucked your thumb instead?

All right, Townspeople, fresh off the high of our First Annual Super Bowl Halftime Show Commentary, we would like to announce, in our role as industry watchdog, Rock Town Hall’s First Annual GRAMMY Bash, kicking off on Friday, February 9, and running through Monday, February 12.

You may have heard about the GRAMMY Awards. Chances are, if you’re a visitor to the Halls of Rock, you don’t give a damn. In fact, you so don’t give a damn that that vein in your forehead bulges out whenever people in the office ask you – Big Music Fan they know you are – who you think’s going to win a GRAMMY. Who are you kidding? We suspect you’re incapable of completely shutting this inherently horrendous event out of your mind. If you were that kind of well-adjusted person, you wouldn’t be checking in here.

No pain, no gain, they say, and if there’s one thing both the GRAMMY Awards and Rock Town Hall promise it’s pain. The pain of too wide a swath of genres for even the “I like all kinds of music!” fraud to appreciate. The pain of Jethro Tull winning an award in the Heavy Metal category long after we knew this unlikely folk-rock-prog band any longer existed. The pain of seeing Elvis Costello & the Attractions lose out to A Taste of Honey for Best New Artist. Pain.

This Friday we’ll begin rolling out in-depth GRAMMY coverage, but little of the stuff you have no business caring about. Again, let’s be real. For example, this press release is the sort of hook we would never stoop to cover. Come on, Recording Academy, stop sending us this stuff!

Look for historical overviews, keys, trends, prognostications, analyses, fashion, and a treasure hunt. The night of the big event, we’ll encourage you to log into Rock Town Hall for Live Commentary. We’ll probably take it through the night and into next Monday morning. Until then, bone up on your nominees, your historic moments, and your moments!