May 142010
 

Townsman andyr and his wife have reported the following series of Rock Crimes. Sensitive viewers are cautioned before proceeding to the video evidence, which was captured by the iPhone of an anonymous audience member. The authorities are currently interviewing witnesses. Please feel free to provide your own testimony in the Comments section for this post. Thank you, andyr family, for your bravery and good citizenship in reporting these crimes.

Watch video evidence of Rock Crimes of flash mob proportions…after the jump!

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What is this world coming to?

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  10 Responses to “BREAKING NEWS! Rock Crimes of Flash Mob Proportions Reported”

  1. Mr. Moderator

    In more coming signs of the apocalypse-type news, here’s John Lydon on WIP sports-talk radio, in Philadelphia, talking to morning show host, Angelo Cataldi, a gigantic goofball who’s never displayed the slightest bit of musical knowledge.

    http://610wip.cbslocal.com/2010/05/14/sex-pistols-johnny-rotten-joins-morning-team/

  2. I’m sorry – did I miss the Waylon Flowers and Madame part?

  3. mikeydread

    What, no Bono?

  4. hrrundivbakshi

    The most heinous part of this is Bruce’s prop guitar. For some reason it really bugs me.

  5. hrrundivbakshi

    But where’s Wyclef Jean?

  6. BigSteve

    This is pretty appalling, but remember they were doing it to save the rainforest. Wait, you mean the rainforest isn’t saved now?

    I blame David Chase for the rehabilitation of this song. That’s a lot to answer for.

  7. Mr. Moderator

    Yeah, the prop guitar will not help in The Boss’ sentencing. At least, if memory serves, he did not holster it.

    The authorities are scheduled to meet with David Chase this afternoon.

    Bone and Wyclef Jean are scheduled to hold a joint press conference this afternoon to deny allegations that they had any role in these Rock Crimes. Then they will lip-synch to REO Speedwagon’s “Heard it from a Friend.”

  8. misterioso

    Mod (adjusts pince-nez), that’s “Take It on the Run” by REO Speedwagon.

    I’m standing up for my man Bono here: don’t tar him with this brush.

    Anyone involved with this–nay, with anything that legitimizes Journey in any fashion–must not escape punishment. Our collective security depends on the enforcement of the law.

  9. Great clip. If the guitar is such a pure prop, wouldn’t it be cooler for Bruce to come out wearing a Tuba? He’d play it just as much.

    Debbie has nothing to do. Who’s the tall woman in the Las Vegas glitter? She’s kind of ignored too. Goldie and her daughter come out and steal all 5 volts of energy from the stars with their suburban mom dancing.

    Did no one get the memo that this song is only ironically good? It’s not actual good. Traitors all.

  10. BigSteve

    The woman in the glitter gown must be Shirley Bassey. She looks pretty good for 73, better actually than Debbie Harry, who qualifies for Social Security in a few weeks.

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