Jun 062021

In our recent Nitpicking thread, I picked a nit over Pink Floyd‘s most down-easy song, “Wish You Were Here,” for copping out with wind effects rather than find a more graceful end to the song. I am here to apologize for picking that nit.

Today, The Rolling Stones‘ “Wild Horses” started. It has a similar intro to “Which You Were Here,” which made me regret my nitpicking with that song and say to no one in particular, “I wish the Stones had cued the wind machine and left me wanting more!”

Maybe it’s just me, but I think “Wild Horses” goes on for a good 3 minutes longer than it has any business going on. The “plaintive,” on-bended-knee lyrics and delivery by Jagger are up their with “Lady Jane.” Or down there, I should say. It’s a charming, promising song at first – and I like the version by Flying Burrito Brothers a little better – but both bands should have had the good sense to cue the wind machine.

What song would you like to turn up the wind on?


  35 Responses to “Cue the Wind Machine, Please”

  1. Happiness Stan

    I don’t remember now exactly how long it was before I found somewhere to stop the car and switch off that thing Bob Dylan allowed to crawl out last year.

    The one which goes on longer than Renaldo and Clara.

    After, possibly, around three minutes, I finally understood what Einstein meant about being sucked into a black hole where time stops working.

    I could have done with a bit of wind on that at around the one minute mark, just to be able to say I’d listened to it once.

  2. hrrundivbakshi

    I dunno about wind machines, but I’d just like to say I am proud to be one of the few — perhaps the only — townsman to have seen the toilet upon which Keef Richards perched to write “Wild Horses.”

  3. 2000 Man

    I’d like Led Zeppelin more if they did the first five notes of Stairway to Heaven and then turned on the wind machine. That would be nice.

  4. HVB, details please! Including, whether you “paid homage,” in any way.

  5. hrrundivbakshi

    “Living Through Another Cuba” by XTC could benefit from a wind machine round about the three minute mark.

  6. “Wild Horses” is flawless. To suggest it needs an edit is insane. Likewise, “Wish You Were Here”.

    I wish someone like Paul Rothchild, who successfully edited “Light My Fire” down to 3 mintues or so for AM radio, would do the same for Elton John’s “Tiny Dancer”. That edited song would be the one missing winner from Elton John’s Greatest Hits, the 70s best of with the cover featuring Elton, dressed up like Jack Nicholson ala Chinatown, sitting at the piano. The Elton John LPs are spotty, but that best of is easily one of the greatest LPs of all time.

    I’ve got about 2000 records to process today, and procrastination mode kicked in as soon as I got up.. Very, very boring work.

  7. BigSteve

    I’m not a huge fan of Wild Horses. The lyrics are a bit ponderous. The thing is, I love the guitar solo that comes in at about the halfway point. It’s succinct, and it fits the flow of the song perfectly. The mistake they make is adding a second guitar solo at about 4:45. It doesn’t add anything to the song, and it’s just begging for the wind machine.

    Sticky Fingers doesn’t need both Wild Horses and Dead Flowers. I’d ditch Wild Horses, along with the ridiculous blackface routine You Got To Move. Move Sister Morphine to Wild Horses’ slot, and the running order becomes

    Side one

    1. “Brown Sugar” 3:48
    2. “Sway” 3:50
    3. “Sister Morphine” 5:31
    4. “Can’t You Hear Me Knocking” 7:14

    Side two

    1. “Bitch” 3:38
    2. “I Got the Blues” 3:54
    3. “Dead Flowers” 4:03
    4. “Moonlight Mile” 5:56

    This would still be 38 minutes long, and it would be a better album. Wild Horses could still be a B-side.

  8. Good morning everyone. 100 records processed. 1900 to go. Again, very, very boring work.

    Sticky Fingers is a near perfect LP. That said, if something had to go, I’d cut “I Got the Blues.” Nothing real special going on there. It’s one of those songs Mike Douglas or Merv Griffin might have perfromed during a show to let the audience know they too could hang with the people. I’m sure BST took a stab at it at some time or another as well.

    Quick heads up. I started reading the Richard Thompson memoir Beeswing last night. I’m already through with a third of the book. Couldn’t put it down. Love Fairport Convention. Lost interest when Sandy Denny took off.

    One last thing. On the way to the Moderator’s two weeks ago, for our usual couples grub and gab fest, me and the wife listened to the Q102 Memorial Day countdown of their 500 Philadelphia favorites. It made a lot more sense than XPN’s similar shitpile. Anyway, one of the choices was Meatloaf’s “Paradise by the Dashboard Light.” Something must be going on with the chemicals in my head because I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. I guess I’m way past the point of caring about anybody’s opinion of me. I found it very catchy and entertaining, and I’m not afraid to share that joy with the rest of the world. I’ve also got a tremendous hangover which hampers my ability to edit properly. Of all the mini operas I’ve heard, that’s one of the better ones. The Who’s “Quick One” is one of the worst. Really, really dumb.

    That’s that. I hope everyone has a nice day. Flowers, peace, and love! Let’s work together and make the world a whole lot brighter!

  9. Don’t take the bait, cdm, this is exactly what EPG is hoping for. Easy buddy, keep it cool. He’s just trolling, don’t give him wat he wants… No, goddamnit! I can’t take it. Enough is enough!

    The version of A Quick One from the Rock and Roll Circus is the single greatest thing that the Who ever did. It’s five or six power pop songs that I would love individually strung together to make one Uber Power Pop song!

    I get that Meatloaf songs take you back to the sweet summer days of your youth when you partied in the woods and almost got your first hand job after getting all banged up on Schlitz. We all have questionable songs that are imprinted in our DNA and triggered by nostalgia. The difference is that most of us can recognize it for what it is. If it weren’t for the presence of Ellen Foley, there would not be a single redeeming thing about that bloated, bombastic, corn encrusted turn of an song/album.

  10. CDM, I respectfully disagree. “A Quick One” is really dumb. Like its larger shit sandwich, Tommy, it makes no sense whatsoever.

    Most of the Rock and Roll Circus is a snoozer, except for the “Yer Blues” jam. I could watch that over and over again ad nauseum. Hell, I could watch the close up of the foot tappin’ shoes for days on end and not be bored for a single second.

  11. garlic salt

    I actually enjoy “Paradise by the Dashboard Light” a fair amount, so I’m with EPG on this one.

    As for the actual question I’m going to say a lot of songs by Television and everything by King Crimson. I really don’t mind prog rock for about the first 3 or 4 minutes, but after that it just gets to be excessive. I know that’s the point but it really isn’t for me.

    While this may not fit the bill entirely I have a song that somewhat does the opposite. I just learned that the long piano bit on Little Feat’s Waiting for Columbus version of “Dixie Chicken” was mostly edited in after the performance. That wasn’t all though, the little bit of dueling guitars was edited in too. It felt kinda like finding out that Santa wasn’t real. Even after finding all that out, still of the opinion that the extension made it far better.

  12. Thanks, Garlic Eater. I knew it wasn’t just me. There had to be another fan of the song up here. It’s a solid piece of work. As far as Television and King Crimson are concerned, I really don’t get it. I enjoy Television’s “See No Evil”, but fail to understand the so called brilliance of the first LP that features an entire B side no one bothers to spin. What little I’ve heard from King Crimson makes it difficult for me to do any further research.

    CDM, what is it exactly about “A Quick One” that makes it so much better than “Paradise by the Dashboard Light”? The only thing I can come up with is that it’s unbelievably uncool to admit one has a taste for ‘Paradise.” You certainly don’t need to hang on to that shit anymore. From what little I know about you, you’ve got it made: wife and kids, nice job, solid band, friends, plenty of money. Am I missing something? Enlighten me.

  13. CDM, no need to search around for clips and what not. I went ahead and did all that for you.

    “Paradise by the Dashboard Light”


    “A Quick One”


    I look forward to hearing from you! Take your time! No rush!

  14. I spent more time in bars at the Jersey Shore than I did in classes at college, so I’m very familiar with PBTDL. I’ve also watched that Who clip countless times. But I just watched them both again to see if I was missing anything.

    PBTDL – Obviously this is just the studio track synched up to what I’m guessing is a staged performance specifically for the video. Karla DiVito is lip-synching the Ellen Foley parts, who was presumably smoking weed with the Clash in an effort to get in a good headspace for Sandinista. This is a very solid attempt at showtune rock. I thought I remembered seeing something about a Bat Out of Hell musical in Jim Steinman’s recent obituaries (sorry for your loss, by the way), and sure enough, google confirms the musical was written in 1994. I’m sure Blood Sweat and Tears could have worked up a respectable version of this too. I once worked with a guy who told me that he and his wife liked to go to Epcot because it was essentially like going to Europe but without all the inconvenience and you could still get Miller Lite. This is an excellent example of Epcot Rock. It sort of looks like rock if you don’t particularly like music. I would be shocked if you could make it through an entire meal at the Hard Rock Café and not be subjected to this.

    AQOWHA – I already mentioned that all of the excellent one minute songs add up to something that is somehow greater than the sum of its parts. I admit that I’ve heard versions of this song that I don’t like and I’ve yet to hear a version of this song that can hold a candle to this one. I don’t know if there are overdubs on this but it doesn’t look like there are. Things I like about this video aside from the Who eating everyone else’s lunch:
    – Pete tuning his guitar mid song. That’s always a cool move.
    – Pete knocking the mic on Keith’s head.
    – Keith discarding his floor tom after the “soon be home” part.
    – John’s choir boy vocals
    – singing “cello, cello cello” instead of having cellos. (Who knows if that’s real or just a myth? Who cares?)

    The real question is which do you prefer: Paradise by the Dashboard Light? Or You’re the One that I Want from the Grease soundtrack?

  15. I shouldn’t have posted the video. The truth of the matter is that I could care less about the live performances. What I was really getting at is actual song construction and story delivery. It’s simply not there in “A Quick One”. If I were in the Who I’d absolutely and positively rely on making the song work via performance because there’s nothing in the song itself to work with. And the whole Epcot rock thing is nonsense. Craft is craft, whether it’s done by Lennon and McCartney or someone writing jingles for Mountain Dew. “You’re the One that I Want” isn’t really anything I look forward to hearing, but it’s certainly a lot better than “A Quick One” and Grease makes Tommy look like a 5 year old’s art collage project.

    One thing I hate more than anything is that whole “This is art, and this is corporate blah, blah, blah.” Again, craft is craft. It’s either there, or it’s not. It’s amazing how much dogshit has been defended in the name of art.

  16. EPG, “Paradise by the Dashboard Light” sucks worse than the worst Mick Jolson performance. It’s as bad as “And When I Die.” I’m sorry, you’re like a brother to me. Garlic Salt is our hope for the future. But both of you are way off base. That’s OK. I’ll take “Kokomo” over “Feel Flows,” or whatever that dumb late-’60s Beach Boys song is called.

    Here’s the thing, are is more than “song construction and story delivery” – or it can be. Art can be about feel. And how it flows, ma, n. “A Quick One,” especially that live performance from Rock ‘n Roll Circus, is loaded with Townshend’s lifelong cries for help. It’s to The Who what Contact is to Jodi Foster. (I don’t know if I really believe that, but Contract may be the most unintentionally funny Cry for Help movie ever.) Seriously, though, I love the little bits of songs, the power chords, the squirmy sexual scenarios, Pete’s efforts to out-emote Roger, Keith’s drums… It’s not “I’m a Boy” or even “Happy Jack,” but I think its ambition is admirable.

    I’m less a fan of Tommy, although that song that plays at Christmastime kills me. Tommy works best, if you ask me, as the ridiculous Ken Russell film, with Roger’s efforts at acting as earnestly as he sings. That says a lot about how I feel about the album Tommy.

    That said, Tommy – the original album – is like Revolver compared with anything Meat Loaf has ever done.

    BTW, HVB and Big Steve both nailed it on their wind machine cues.

  17. Moderator, when did you start smoking pot again? I thought you, me, and the ladies were going to tackle that one together.

    Garlic Eater, I need your help on this one. I have a feeling you’re around the same age as my daughters. Their friends used to come over to the house a lot, and inevitably one of them would bang away at the piano. One of the pieces that was played frequently was Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing.” Once that opening riff got going, my daughters’ friends would sing along and have themselves a hell of a good time. Journey has always been a band that makes me wanna vomit. That said, I have to give credit where credit is due. The opening piano riff is a winner and the build is solid as well. There’s good reason why it holds up. It’s a good song. The so called feel that the moderator goes on about in his previous Afghani bud fueled post is certainly in “Don’t Stop” as well. Just because it doesn’t move him means nothing whatsoever. It’s done a number on millions of people over the years.

    I’d really appreciate it if you could let the hall know why “Paradise” works for you. The smell coming from the RTH’s old farts is debilitating. Light a few matches, get rid of the stink, and provide some much needed fresh air and illumination.

  18. hrrundivbakshi

    The doctor sighed, and signed his name at the bottom of the prescription form before tearing it off and handing it to a nervous looking E. Pluribus Gergely. He glanced at his watch for a moment and said, “you’ll need to present that at your proctologist’s office before setting up your appointment.” He paused again, then said with an air of sincere concern, “your problem is a simple one: you’ve simply got too much old fecal matter lodged inside your body. A thorough cleansing will help restore the proper balance. I want to see you again in three months. In the meantime: no more Meat Loaf.”

  19. hrrundivbakshi

    Oh, and: “Epcot Rock” made me laugh out loud. Bravolingus, cdm!

  20. I will freely admit that A Quick One lacks the incisive song construction and story delivery of, say, this:

    “I’m Henery The Eighth, I Am! Henery The Eighth, I Am, I am!
    I got married to the widow next door,
    She’s been married seven times before.
    And ev’ryone was a Henery,
    She wouldn’t have Willie or a Sam.
    I’m her eighth old man named Henery,
    Henery the Eighth, I Am!
    Second verse same as the first!”

    You really get a feel for arc of the narrator’s personal journey. If his parents hadn’t named him ‘enry, his life would look profoundly different. Sliding doors, etc..,

    A cheap shot, I know. But I’m a guy whose favorite song of all time is Good Lovin’ by the Rascals. Clearly I don’t need a Pulitzer Prize winner for a lyricist. I can appreciate good lyrics but sometimes adequate lyrics are perfect. Unlike the Mod, I don’t need to get into Pete’s head to enjoy his music. I’d actually prefer not to be in Pete’s head. Sometimes I just want to hear a catchy song (or string of chords) that kicks ass.

    And I don’t buy for a minute that “story delivery” means very much to you either.

  21. CDM, there’s just one minor problem with all this. Townshend ran his mouth constantly about how the Who were so much more than just about anything out at the time. Hell, he even had the gall to tell an interviewer that the Beatles were weak instrumentally. He clearly believed he was delivering something out of the ordinary, and he wanted all to know it. Unfortunately, what he served up was a giant turd. You’re right to believe story delivery isn’t all that important to me, but it is when it’s creator tells the world he’ll be serving up a masterpiece. And one should expect to get his balls kicked in when one runs his mouth about the power of his art and doesn’t deliver

    I love the Who up to and including Sell Out. This is painful shit for me. Townshend has driven me out of my mind for ages. He”s been struggling to figure out who he wants to be from the moment he came out of the womb. Thank God for Kit Lambert who more or less told him who to be and what kind of music to make. The whole mod thing was more or Less Lambert’s idea, and thank God for that because he managed to get a shitload of winners out of Townshend. Were it not for Lambert, Townshend would have done nothing. From what I’ve read, he preferred sleeping to just about anything. When the Mod thing ran its course, Lambert knew they had to up the ante, and that’s when the whole rock opera thing kicked in. Like I said previously, none of that worked for me because most of what was created in that genre made no sense whatsoever. His bandmates at the time had a similar opinion. The staff at Rolling Stone gave Townshend a forum for long interviews about his art and didn’t dare criticize what he was serving up. Jann Wenner loved the fact that he could count Townshend as an acquaintance. Wenner had a similar thing going on with Jagger. Wenner, as well as Dave Marsh, were the first of many that kissed Townshend’s ass and brought out the worst in him. When the Townshend-Lambert relationship ended, Townshend befriended even more zeros and strengthened his bond with Marsh and Wenner who successfully turned him into a complete bozo. He doesn’t see it that way, but it’s all there in spades in his godawful autobiography.

    As far as “Good Lovin’ ” is concerned, it kicks ass from beginning to end. I love the showmanship of drummer Dino Danelli. You don’t hear too much about him. Don’t know why.

  22. EPG,

    You don’t hear much about Dino Danelli because you travel in the wrong circles. Jon Kelsey and I have bonded over his sticksmanship frequently. Hell he even got a chapter in Max Weinberg’s book of interviews of his drumming idols. (The book was much better than Weinberg’s drumming.

  23. Happiness Stan

    Crikey, not sure if I dare show my head above the parapet here at the mo.

    At the risk of getting my neck chewed, didn’t A Quick One come before Sell Out? So does that one not count?

    I’d go further and say they only made two great albums, the aforementioned, which used to be sold as a budget double album here, and Who’s Next, which would be even better if the wind machine had been available for some of its lesser moments. I approached them first through a knock off hits collection of questionable provenance I picked up in Germany with a fake Track label, and when they eventually rereleased the My Generation album I was distinctly underwhelmed.

    I’m firmly on the side of team Quick One, probably because I saw the Rock and Roll Circus clip at an impressionable age and remain impressed. I would maintain it’s possibly the greatest performance by any band ever committed to film or video.

    The song itself is as English as Midnight Rambler would like to be American. It’s pure mid sixties British sitcom stuff, all music hall and saucy seaside postcards, and as such culturally ask but impossible for me as a Brit of that era to approach objectively.

    Tommy and Quadrophenia are like two turds on the highway. If I were to drive through both simultaneously, it’s hard to guess which would get through the Aircon filters first. If pressed, I’d go for Tommy as it has about one decent tune per side rather than the single decent tune on the other, which outstays its welcome by at least a couple of minutes.

    I think I only know three Meat Loaf songs, if you cut the choruses out, I wouldn’t know one from the other. They sound completely interchangeable to me. I’ve heard him on chat shows on the radio, though, and was in stitches every time. I’d happily go and see him if he was doing an evening of stand up comedy.

  24. Happiness, I accept all that. Just to clarify though, I have no problems with the performance. I don’t think it’s the greatest thing since sliced bread, but it’s certainly entertaining. Again, my problem is with the song itself. It doesn’t work for me and neither does Rael, Tommy, Quadrophenia, and the 25 or so other rock opera flops he vomited up around the same time he became interested in child pornography. Quadrophenia is nothing to write home about, but it’s certainly better than the other stinkers. I love the Quadrophenia film, but I fear that that may be a sentimental thing, like your experience with A Quick One. My high school punk gang never tired of seeing Quadrophenia over and over again at the midnight movies, which included trips to Elby’s afterward for pots of coffee, trays of grecian toast for 10 cents a slice, great conversation, and gossiping that went on until 3 or 4 o’clock in the morning. I force myself not to revisit Quadrophenia because I don’t want to jeopardize the power of all those glorious memories. I dread that it might not hold up.

    I too find Meatloaf entertaining. There’s a great classic albums episode of Bat out of Hell, and he’s the reason why. He comes out of the gate right away as someone you’re not expecting. He’s the antithesis of everything you may have seen in the Bat out of Hell videos on You Tube. He’s polite, engaging, humble, and very funny. Check out that episode sometime!

  25. Kelsey and I have had conversations about him. Good to hear that you and others of your gang are into him as well!

  26. BigSteve

    The narrative of A Quick One is not exactly clear. We learned much later that it has to do with Pete’s issues, but that’s not really important. I find the “you are all forgiven” ending quite moving. We all need forgiveness, and I find it liberating to let down my defenses for a fucking change and let the Who forgive me.

  27. Am I underthinking the lyrics to A Quick One? A girlguide’s man has been away for a year, she sleeps with Ivor, they are reunited, and everyone is forgiven. Not groundbreaking but where’s the mystery?

    And yes, Dino Dinelli kicks ass.

  28. Good morning, everyone! I want all to know that I’m a little disappointed that I didn’t hear from Garlic Eater. I was so looking forward to his defense of “Paradise by the Dashboard Light.” Call me crazy, but I believed his defense might have opened up the possibility of a mentor like relationship between us, not unlike that of Lester Bangs and Cameron Crowe. For those of you who are unaware of the relationship, I ask you to watch the following compilation of scenes from Almost Famous:


    The movie is flawed, but it does have a few memorable moments, not great, but certainly worth a watch. The compilation link gives you a general idea of the sort of thing I wish to cultivate with Garlic Eater. And I would prefer that the rest of you steer clear of him and let me mold the clay.

  29. Also, EPG, if we’re bring in external elements into an evaluation of the quality of a song, please explain how you dislike Townsend because you view his occasionally misguided artistic ambitions to be lofty and self satisfied, but you are okay with Meatloaf’s bombastic showtune/rock hybrids (faux-tunes?) even though he is a supporter of Rick Santorum, Chris Christie, the trump family, etc.

    Your condemnation of AQOWHA, Tommy and Quadrophenia (which I give respectively an A+, a C+, and, if it were a single album, a B), seem to be hung up on Pete’s motivations and other elements outside the work itself. I can separate the art from the artist depending on the severity of the offense and the quality of the work.

  30. For the record, the external elements I discussed in a previous post got Townshend out of bed, told him who to be, and what kind of music to make. I could care less if that person was Kit Lambert, Dave Marsh, or Strom Thurmond. The buck stop with the actual music. It either works, or it doesn’t.

  31. Imagine a person who was childhood chess prodigy, went on become a star college athlete, graduated top of the class in med school to become a renowned surgeon, and has short stories published in the New Yorker but donates those payments to fund a Women’s shelter. Such a person would be endlessly fascinating and admirable. If that person in a candid moment ever admitted that “Oh yeah, I also like to fuck goats and don’t care what people think of that” then the next time you saw that person, the very first thing you would think of is, Hey there’s that goat-fucker who actually enjoys hearing Paradise by the Dashboard Lights. Keep those shameful wrong thoughts to yourself rather than say them out loud in the name of honesty.

    (and by the way, the best thing Meat Loaf ever did was act in Fight Club which I believe you still refuse to see once)

  32. Point well taken. What appears to work for you may not be something for me. I’ll steer clear of the crack pipe.

  33. EPG, based on your takes in this thread, I would encourage you to give the crack pipe a try. I can’t imagine you run the risk of becoming more misguided and it might be the very shock that your system needs.

  34. Lol!!!!! I knew that was coming!

  35. Sometimes the ball looks as big as a watermelon when it comes over the plate…

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