Oct 012011

I couldn’t stop laughing when I heard this. “I am the desk lamp.” But the real question is who will buy it? Surely not fans of Metallica. Certainly not fans of Lou. Is this a marriage made in Hari Kari?

Can anyone think of a worse pairing? Seriously Lou, please retire.


  14 Responses to “Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha ..”

  1. Happiness Stan

    I tried to listen to this earlier, but gave up at less than halfway through, not because it is terrible but because it is just so boring (and actually spent about twenty seconds longer in the company of the BS&T version of Sympathy for the Devil which was posted the other day – at least that elicited an emotional response).

    I like the idea of Lou Reed, and I like the idea of Metallica, but apart from the first three VU albums have never bought a record/CD by either of them, nor as far as I can remembered listened to one in its entirety by Lou since about 1979.

    The thing I find most odd about the hype around this collaboration is that Metallica are portrayed as being the evil hard men at the cutting edge of rock, when they are actually one of the most popular bands in the world.

    I’d be far more impressed if Lou were to collaborate with The Fall, who actually really couldn’t give a rat’s bottom about commercial success, although it would be even better if Reed played guitar and Mark E Smith sang, as he’s always been a more interesting lyricist and has far better jokes.

  2. tonyola

    For me, the post-Velvet Lou Reed has always been an artist who steered dangerously close to the “Bullshit On” shoals. Can he sing? Not really. Is he a musician? Not really. Can he turn a clever phrase? Sometimes, when he feels like it. Does he have attitude? Oh yeah, by the truckload. And that’s the source of his fame and reputation.

    I wrote this in a posting back in June. There were some people here who lambasted me for saying that Lou wasn’t really a musician. With this “Lulu” clip, I have been vindicated.

  3. Ha, no, you haven’t, but more power to you for holding onto your beliefs:) I know you’re sincere and obviously the broader things you’re saying in the bit you quoted from June have some merit, but summarizing it with “Lou wasn’t really a musician” is what makes you sound like the kind of smug fart we lived through in the ’70s, before punk rock loosened the 4″ x 4″ shoved up too many rear ends. There are many ways for people to make music. Lou’s done some beautiful, powerful stuff with his awkward limited means. This thing with Metallica – at least this first song we’re hearing – is horrible, but it’s not because he’s “not a musician.” Rather than re-post your original position, why not dig deeper and help us better understand what makes a “real musician?”

    By the way, if this “Lulu” thing is part of some German theater piece or whatever is touted as the source in the opening of the clip, is it possible that this song is a “scene setter,” like the opening song on Berlin, which also goes nowhere? Maybe this album will do something that makes a little sense with the collaborators. Like KingEd said the other day, this track sounds like none of the participants share a recording space let alone a headphone mix.

  4. tonyola

    There are many ways for people to make music.

    Very true, even if it does sound close to being a Reader’s Digest platitude. Look at the Shaggs, Wild Man Fischer, Mrs. Miller, Screaming Lord Sutch, and Kevin Federline. If they can be called musicians, then so can Lou. As an aside, I have in the past expressed admiration for Berlin.

  5. I know we’re on the same page with Berlin. I do agree with the general sentiment expressed by machinery that it’s time Lou calls it a day – or takes off the Fonzie jacket, as E. Pluribus Gergely would call it, once and for all and see if he’s capable of doing anything truly different.

  6. tonyola

    Perhaps he can quit music and take up painting like the late Captain Beefheart. The good Captain got a fair number of positive notices about his latter-day artwork. Who says it can’t happen to Lou? Or maybe novels? Lou knows how to tell a story, I bet.

  7. misterioso

    Not that it matters, but based on the text on that the source of this Lulu “story” would be the same as that of the silent film Pandora’s Box with Louise Brooks. Which is to say, watch the movie and skip the record.

  8. misterioso

    Anyway, aren’t we all going to be surprised when this turns out to be some sort of hoax?

  9. I’d rather Metallica retire…..Lou can be awful, but he can be great, as well….those guys have always been just mediocre, which, for me, is worse than being awful.

  10. BigSteve

    I was going to bring up Pandora’s Box myself. I recently got a chance to see it again on the big screen, and it is highly recommended. I’ve also read Wedekind’s Lulu plays (though it was long ago, when I was German major in college). Anyway, out of context the lyrics might seem silly, but I can see where they’re coming from. To answer machinery’s question, I think Lou’s fans (like me) are much more likely to buy this album than Metallica’s. There was another voice on this song, presumably Hetfield’s, and I wasn’t expecting that. It does give me pause, but I definitely want to hear this album. I predict that good reviews will be few and far between.

  11. tonyola

    The latest issue of Rolling Stone gives four stars to “The View” single. Once again, RS revels in its fawning cluelessness and shows us just how out of touch with reality they are.

  12. ladymisskirroyale

    It seems that quite a few musicians also participate in the visual arts. This is a show opening next week (which includes Mr. Royale) – check out how many musicians are among the ranks (and what they are selling their work for). Interestingly, Kurt and Courtney’s daughter has recently shown at this gallery – she didn’t sell quite as much when the art was identified under a pseudonym but when her identity was leaked, everything of hers sold.

  13. jeangray

    Metallica’s fans will eat this shit up!

  14. Lou’s fans will hate the music
    Metallica’s fans will hate Lou’s voice

    A match made in the used CD shop

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