Mar 292012
 

Name the owner of these famous rock boobs for extra credit

Somebody pointed me in the direction of this fascinating web page yesterday:

http://www.fleshmap.com/listen/music.html

It purports to show, in graphic detail, what body parts are most often celebrated through song, across a wide range of musical genres. Some of the preferred parts will come as no surprise (I bet you can guess what part is most often name-checked in a typical hip-hop number). But I was quite surprised to find no apparent love for breasts. You know, knockers. Gazongas. Jugs. Jubblies. Etcetera.

That got me thinking about songs that actually refer to boobs… and, other than ZZ Top‘s single-entendre masterpiece “Pearl Necklace” (which never really mentions boobs directly) I came up pretty empty. Can you think of any?

I look forward to your responses.

HVB

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  53 Responses to “Last Man Ogling: Songs About Boobs”

  1. ladymisskirroyale

    Do you get extra points if you mention Mama’s boobs?

    • 2000 Man

      No. You have to go home for the day.

      That we site is disturbing. There’s no way they actually know how many songs mention what in all those genres, so someone just sat there and made it up. Why would they do that?

      The Stones mention breasts now and then. On Let it Bleed she says “my breasts, they will always be open.” Then on This Place is Empty (which is pretty horrible) Keith sings, “Come on, bare your breasts, and make me feel at home.” Except he seems to have problems with that word and it’s more like “Come on, bare your breathts.” I think his dentures get in the way.

  2. hrrundivbakshi

    2000 Man is currently LMO!

  3. alexmagic

    Maybe the most relatively tasteful possible entry: “Everybody needs a bosom for a pillow…” from Cornershop’s Brimful of Asha

  4. Steve Miller’s “The Joker”: “Really love your peaches, want to shake your tree.”

  5. misterioso

    Ummmm, Bob Seger, “Night Moves”? “Points all her own,” etc.?

  6. Nick Lowe – “So Fine”

    “She’s got a pair of t*&s that just won’t quit”

  7. cherguevarra

    Sparks – “Tits”

  8. mockcarr

    does the silicone sister from Blinded By The Light count?

  9. tonyola

    “It Wasn’t My Idea to Dance” – the Move.

    “Once again you clutch me to your warming breast
    Now I lay me down to rest”

    A strange and menacing song, by the way. Heavy metal meets oboe.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xL82woPq8yw

  10. Happiness Stan

    The Stranglers – Tits

    Knowing that it exists does not imply approval

  11. tonyola

    “Love So Fine” – Nick Lowe

    “She’s got a pair of tits that just won’t quit”

  12. From Pulp’s “Disco 2000″: “You were the first girl at school to get breasts/and Martyn said that you were the best.”

  13. “…“Pearl Necklace” (which never really mentions boobs directly)…”

    I had to think about that one, mighty saucy. I wrote a song called “Honey Let Me Honk Your Horn” but I guess that doesn’t count.

    The best I can think of is Lyle Lovette’s “I’ve been to Memphis” but he only makes you think he’s singing about boobs.

    Sherry she had big ones
    Sally had some too
    But Allison had little ones
    What hate to go to school

  14. The “famous rock boobs” looks like Marylin Manson’s to me.

  15. tonyola

    Rusty Warren – “Bounce Your Boobies”. Considered really naughty in 1961.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-kc0lBR96s&feature=results_video&playnext=1&list=PL9553B46347796EB7

  16. misterioso

    Faces, “Silicone Grown.”

  17. BigSteve

    Loudon Wainwright’s Rufus is a Tit Man.

  18. tonyola

    “Boobs A Lot” by the Fugs and Holy Modal Rounders

    “They’re big and round,
    They’re all around.”

  19. Zappa’s “Wet T-Shirt Night”.
    When did they change the title to “Fembot in a Wet T-Shirt”??

  20. Shakira, “Whenever, Wherever”:

    “Lucky that my breasts are small and humble / So you don’t confuse them with mountains”

    Which, shockingly, is not even the most bizarre line in a Shakira song.

  21. tonyola

    “Titties & Beer” – Frank Zappa

  22. cherguevarra

    Scissor Sisters – “T*ts on the radio.”

  23. rexjupiter

    …there’s red eyed Ruby with her built up hips / She’s got nut crushing boobs and jam tart lips / Says her angle is connections downtown L.A / When you know she’s just a hustler from the boys’ brigade… Humble Pie – “79th and Sunset” sung by Steve Marriott

    • hrrundivbakshi

      Can I just say that Humble Pie wrote the absolute, all-time, hand-down GREATEST sleaze-rock anthems? I have a greatest hits comp that has like two or three of them — what are they again? — “Hot and Nasty” is one for sure. “79th & Sunset,” for sure. What’s the one I’m forgetting?

  24. Wendy O. Williams of the Plasmatics?

  25. o come ON!!!!

    “I.L.B.T.’s” by that schticky “How ya doooin’?” man Joe Walsh!!

    “I like tits for breakfast, for a midnight snack
    I like tits for lunch…a Big Tit Attack!”

    aloha
    LD

  26. At least half of the Rolling Stones’ “Little T&A” seems to be about breasts, although that song is so lame I can’t focus on whatever it’s actually about.

  27. H. Munster

    “I’ll let you flip my flipper if you let me unzip your zipper.” The Donnas – “Play My Game”

  28. Bobby Bittman

    The Queers – “Ursala Finally Has Tits”

    http://youtu.be/JopoiDosV6

  29. mockcarr

    Isn’t that Stacia who used to dance naked on stage for Hawkwind?

  30. Jewish Princess by Zappa.

    “I want a dainty little Jewish princess, with titanic tits, and sandblasted zits”

  31. rexjupiter

    Possibly 30 Days In The Hole? That song was anthemic and sleazy!

  32. “Knockers Up” – Rusty Warren again
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfnBT4lVZ_Q

  33. FYI: I’ve got a post from Happiness Stan ready to launch later today.

  34. Somewhat related — National Cleavage Day is trending on Twitter!

  35. Townshend’s “Give Blood” gets all maternal and pretentious with “the man who longs for the stifling, milk-flowing bosom”.

  36. ladymisskirroyale

    I know you all are fans of musical theater, but here’s a song all about breasts and bottoms:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3x09R5DKWYo

  37. “Long Cool Woman”

    A pair of moneybags made me open my eyes
    My temperature started to rise