Jun 132013



Let’s play Rock ‘n Roll General Managers, shall we? You are the GM of The Beatles or The Rolling Stones. Your mission is to put together a trade with your respected and beloved rival band that benefits both bands. It can be a one-for-one trade or a multi-musician deal. The bands can even trade trademark songs. As Rock ‘n Roll Fantasy League Commissioner, I may even approve a 3-band deal, involving personnel from one of the other big British Invasion bands. My role in these decisions, of course, will be guided by the Best Interests of the Game.

Although longtime friendly rivals, The Beatles and The Stones do not have a long record of musician transactions. The lads from Liverpool did help launch the career of the the scruffy London upstarts by dealing them “I Wanna Be Your Man” to for future considerations. John Lennon and Keith Richard barnstormed in The Dirty Mac. Brian Jones took batting practice with The Beatles’ on a silly B-side. Art dealer Robert Fraser shows up in the biographies of both bands. I believe a young American photographer named Linda Eastman was scouted by The Stones before landing in Paul McCartney’s pad. Billy Preston is probably the one musician closely identified with both bands. Therefore, Preston is NOT eligible for any trade between these bands. Regarding another man closely identified with both bands, The Stones have already declared “No trade-backs!” on Allen Klein.

Stones’ GMs may trade from their band’s full array of “other” guitarists along with dedicated sidemen, like Ian Stewart and Bobby Keys. Stones’ wives and longtime lovers are not untouchable. Even outright hangers-on, such as drug dealer “Spanish Tony” Sanchez, are in play. Likewise, Beatles’ GMs may select from their deep roster of engineers, sidemen, wives, hangers-on, and hagiographers.

Let the trade talks begin!


  18 Responses to “Beatles, Stones Make Win-Win Trade”

  1. I would trade Charlie Watts for Ringo Star. It would not make one bit of difference but it would keep everyone on their toes.

  2. misterioso

    Around ’68 there was talk of trading George Martin and Alan Parsons for Jimmy Miller and Glyn Johns but the Rock Commissioner stepped in and put the kibosh on the blockbuster deal as not being “in the best interests of rock ‘n’ roll.”

  3. Just a year later Johns would be acquired in an August waiver wire deal for the stretch run.

  4. diskojoe

    Hmm….is this post influenced at all w/the current situation w/Mr. Mod’s fave rave baseball team?

    Anyway, how about trading Yoko Ono from Team Beatles for Marianne Faithfull from team Rolling Stones?

  5. I think you need to build trust before you can go for the blockbuster.

    I propose trading Ian Stewart for Billy Preston. Besides his keyboards, as a player/asst traveling secretary, Ian would also help Mal drive the van and such. Billy Preston would give the Stones more of the real african-american presense they desire at a corner position.


  6. Love the photoshop BTW. Great series of baseball cards (1972?)

    Toy Cannon & Lefty were part of the “Traded” series!

  7. Great rationale, but Preston already served time in both bands. He toured with the Stones in the ’70s.

    May I suggest a trade of Little Richard for Tina Turner instead? I could see Richard prodding Jagger to new heights, while Tina could replace Yoko in the bag – with holes cut out for her gams, of course.

  8. My guess is that telewacker will know who originally graced that card!

  9. I would like to propose a flip of anthems: “Hey Jude” for “You Can’t Always Get What You Want,” straight up. I’ve always felt like “Hey Jude” stunted the progress of “Let It Be” (the song). It would be like when the Pirates let Dave Cash walk so super-sub Rennie Stennett could play everyday. The Stones could have done a much better “soulful” version of “Hey Jude” than Wilson Pickett did. Not that Pickett’s version is bad or anything, but it’s not definitive. I’d like to hear Keef and Mick Taylor trading hammer-on chord licks with Jagger and a his backing singers belting out the chorus. The Stones could retain that boys’ choir for the fadeout.

    The Beatles, meanwhile, could have added a little more pathos to “You Can’t Always Get What You Want.” The Stones’ version, while tremendous, puts the emphasis on the song’s punchline of a title. Do you really get a chance to feel much for Mr. Jimmy and the other characters Mick observes? I don’t think so. Paul and John would bring those folks to life and bring out a more compassionate side to the punchline. Unlike Charlie, Ringo would be able to play the fadeout himself; Jimmy Miller could stay behind the board with the Stones.

  10. Interesting… John could still spiral off into heroin with a girl of good breeding. Yoko could add a little personality to “As Tears Go By”… The Stones, for all their exotic women, never had a long-term relationship with an Asian woman, did they? The Stones, regardless of whether Mick or Keef land Yoko, would have been able to break up long before stinking:)

  11. They could trade early managers. Brian Epstein for Loog Oldham. Mick and Keith and Brian were more posh to begin with so they could have been the mop-top idols. And the Beatles would have to play “bad boy” to the Stones “good boy”. Lennon would be really nasty and and Ringo would date 15 yr olds and George would be dead in a pool. Damn shame.

  12. Quick tangent topic. Anyone else see Macca on Colbert? I thought he was really good. Funny to think he’s probably been playing with that same solo band longer than he did with the Fab Four.

  13. Who will the Stones have to cough up in order to get Bernard “Pretty” Purdie?

  14. diskojoe

    You know, the more I think about it, I believe that an Anita Pallenberg (sic) for Yoko swap would be more interesting.

  15. I recognize that year — 1974 — the same year as the famous “Washington Nat’l League” cards.


    I had every card in the series — the old fashioned way by buying packs — except for the rare Dan Fife (Twins).

  16. The only possibility for an even up trade would be for Steve Jordan – but I’m mystified as to the Purdie reference – was he a September callup? I don’t recall him as being on the 25 man roster

  17. He claims to have been the drummer on a number of tracks:

    “He doesn’t remember specific titles except one he calls Yeah Yeah Yeah — obviously ‘She Loves You’.”


    Weinberg: You played on Beatles’ tracks?

    Purdie: Twenty-one of them.

    Weinberg: Do you remember which ones?

    Purdie: Ummhmm.

    Weinberg: Which ones?

    Purdie: That’s information I don’t disclose.

    Weinberg: Why won’t you name the tracks?

    Purdie: Because if I need that information to get me some money, then I’ll have what’s necessary. I also played on songs by the Animals, the Monkees.

    Weinberg: Everyone knows the Monkees were a fabricated band, but The Beatles?

    Purdie: Ringo never played on anything.

    Weinberg: Ringo never played on anything?

    Purdie: Not the early Beatles stuff.

  18. I liked it as well. I thought Paul sounded a lot better than I’ve heard him in any live recording of the last 5 years (where he’s usually of Brian Wilson cringe-worthiness).

    My other thought was it seems impossible for Paul to not come off as smarmy and egotistical. But then Colbert asked him a question on the lines of “when did you realize you were one of the greatest songwriters of all time?” and it made me think how truly impossible a task Paul faces. One of the greatest songwriters of all time, probably as recognized a name around he world as anyone, etc., etc., How do you not come off as egotistical?

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